Holy Space
Well, I haven't posted anything here for a while but have been sort of bouncing off the atmosphere of Planet Dression myself, although for different reasons than everyone else here. I've been feeling like I have been wasting my life so badly that God is going to majorly come down on me when my talents and what I did with them are reviewed.

My job is getting harder and harder to do for any length of time and I really check out and look at whatever on the internet a lot - not a good thing I know but it's really hard when it's been going so badly here sales and otherwise. I also feel sort of like "the lone Christian" overall and talk to very few people about this, it just seems like most people have thier own stuff that is actually way worse than my thing, which is comfortable in that I have money and health and all of that but it seems like those things just make it so that I don't do much to change things. The one thing that has made me feel better lately has been writing music and getting it recorded - if there was a miracle for me, it would be that God would "restore the years that the locusts have eaten" and I'd actually write music somehow full time - although unless something just plops itself right in front of me, I have no ideas on how to make that happen other than just keep doing what I've been doing.

As far as a marriage or even a dating relationship, there is no sign of that and I've gotten tired enough of the time and energy drain of that that I've almost been relieved to be at the point that I just don't want to think about it at this point - except for the fact that the clock of life is really ticking and I wonder if I really might never have this in my life. So, God - my strength is just about done, so maybe I am finally ready to sit back and see what You can do, but maybe that's what you've been waiting for - You know I have a huge capacity to keep on keeping on that can sometimes work to my detrement. So - OK - I'm watching and waiting......